Updated: Jul 24, 2019
You showed me what it is to be strong, wise, persistent and loyal. You were my first superhero. I love you Dad.
Growing up, my dad worked hard to make sure that my sister and I had everything we needed plus the extras. He made sure that I could go to ballet lessons and enjoy a plethora of experiences that I will never forget. I remember Dad taking a job that may have looked marvelous on his resume but sacrificed some saneness. He commuted 2 hours per day for years. That was a sacrifice that he made for us in order to be able to experience childhood in ways that he may not have been able to himself. Many times, it was usually too late for him to attend some of our after-school activities. When dad should have been sleeping, instead he managed to expose us to camping, teaching us to ride a bike, family get-togethers and most importantly unconditional love. I remember dad taking us to his Alma-mater, Michigan State University. We would walk along the banks, feeding ducks, talk about everything and nothing.
Dad purposely passed life lessons about the world about strength and being your own advocate. No man is perfect, but he managed to reveal the lesson in his imperfections. I love my dad. My dad is super! He is still strong, and I still believe that he could take anybody out despite being in his 70’s. I believe it mostly because he believes it and he may have just enough testosterone to do it. I love my dad’s intellect and love calling him up to discussed the latest headlines. I love my dad’s sense of humor. There is no way that you could be around him for more than 5 minutes without a laugh. I love that despite regular father daughter growing pains in my teens and early twenties, he still has my back no matter what. I know that I am blessed to still have him and will never take that for granted.
The reality is that Dad is not superhuman, and that terrifies me to the core. Although I want to believe that Dad is invincible, the truth is that none of us are. The physical prowess which is undoubtedly still the core of the man I know to be my Dad begins to display its infuriating fractures in architecture. I just want to scream why? I want to cover my eyes and only see what my memories allow me to see. I also want to fix anything that is wearing and make it brand new again. I remember that I am aware do not have this kind of power. My heart is so heavy just knowing that time and life will stop for no one. The bodies and minds that God has gifted us to use during our stay here on earth is just not made to last forever. I sometimes cry when I think about me personal superman daddy and how hard he worked to transform me into a superwoman.
I struggle with feelings of guilt when I think about where life has taken me geographically. I have been all over the world and have landed in a place still far away from home. My new norm is to to figure my new norm, with dad and wrestle with the idea that roles will eventually reverse for my sister and myself. I have to be the strong woman that he and mom raised me to be and take comfort in knowing that dad passed down his super hero powers to me. He will always and forever be my superhero daddy and I will always love and him for it.
The legacy continues.
Love Charissa Marie